When feedback isn’t working…

This summer, my daughter was doing something every single day that I wanted her to change, but no amount of feedback was fixing the situation.

Finally, I took a different approach—and guess what? It worked! (Of course, I share all the details in this week's Two-Minute Tip.)

If you're tired of addressing the same frustration over and over again with your team, this quick video is a must-watch. Discover how a simple change in approach—focusing on the system rather than the individual—can lead to lasting improvements.

• Read the video transcript

  All summer long, there has been one thing that has been very frustrating to my older daughter and I, and that thing is that multiple times a day, my younger daughter comes to us and asks, "Hey, have I taken my vitamins yet today?"

  And every time we say the same thing, "We don't know. That's not our responsibility to keep track of that. That's up to you." And yet, no matter how many times we say this to her, it doesn't seem to change the behavior and we continue to get the question every day.

  And so finally I got a little bit smarter and I ordered one of those pill counters on Amazon. And now at the beginning of the week, she sorts out her vitamins for the week and she keeps track along the way. She can visibly see whether or not she has taken her vitamins and we no longer get asked that question. Ah, the peace that it has brought!

  So I bring this up because so often when one of our team members, when one of our employees is demonstrating an undesired behavior, we get laser focused on the behavior and changing the behavior, or we get focused on their personality and what it is about them that is causing this unwanted behavior. And sometimes no amount of feedback or clarity will actually get them to change the behavior.

  Instead, we need to zoom out and think about what structure or system do I have in place to clearly articulate the desired behavior and then to reinforce this desired behavior. If we stop just focusing on the person or the behavior, and instead we think about the system -- the meeting, the dashboard, the check-in, whatever we can put in place some structure to help reinforce the desired behavior, that's when we will see an improvement. That's when we will see a change.

  So I want you to think of a specific unwanted behavior on your team now, and think about what structure or system do you have in place to help reinforce what's wanted. And if there isn't one in place, that is your next step. Consider how you might establish a system or structure to help reinforce the desired behavior.