The Leadership Lesson We Have to Keep Relearning
My 95-pound chocolate lab and I went for a walk last night… and apparently, he had forgotten everything we’d worked on.
For a while, I’d been pretty diligent about leash training him, and we were making real progress. But after taking a couple of weeks off, we headed out again and it felt like we were right back where we started.
As I found myself thinking, “We already covered this! Don’t you know what you’re supposed to do?”
I realized how often leaders think the exact same thing.
We communicate an expectation. We talk about it in a team meeting. We give feedback. And then, when the behavior doesn’t stick, we wonder why we have to say it again.
But one of our most important jobs as leaders isn’t just to communicate clearly, it’s to create consistency around the things that matter most.
In this Two-Minute Tip, I share the reminder I clearly needed too, along with three simple ways leaders can help important expectations and behaviors actually stick.
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Leaders, here's the reality. You can communicate something perfectly, and you still need to communicate it again.
I was reminded of this last night on a dog walk. We have a huge chocolate lab. He's 95 pounds, so strong, and he's terrible on a leash. And what this means is that my girls aren't really strong enough to take him on walks, and so you can guess who that responsibility falls on.
So for a long time, I was working really hard on leash training him, and he was actually getting better. And then for a couple of weeks, I kind of got tired of taking him and wanted to go on my own walks again, and so didn't take him until last night we went back out again. And what do you know? He seemed to have forgotten everything we covered before in the training.
And I found myself thinking... We already worked on this. We've talked about this. I already explained the expectation. We've covered this in our team meeting. Don't you know what you're supposed to do? Now, obviously I didn't have a team meeting with my dog, but you get the point. This is what we often feel as leaders.
We've covered this before. Why isn't it happening the way we discussed?
And that's when you have to remember that yes, one of your most important jobs as a leader is to communicate things clearly, but the second most important thing is to repeat that, to reinforce the message consistently. You cannot just say it once and expect that everybody gets it and will continue with that expectation.
One of the most important jobs you have as a leader is to create consistency around the things that matter most.
And so three specific things to keep in mind here. One, you need to repeat it. Literally just say the message again.
Two, you need to reinforce it. When you notice people doing the thing that was discussed, praise it, recognize it, give affirmation there.
practices that reinforce the behavior.
So for example, if giving feedback is a behavior that you want to see happen regularly on the team, then let's add it as a consistent agenda item in every single one-on-one. That's a system, a practice that reinforces the desired behavior.
And then lastly, redirect it. I know we think this only applies to parenting young children, but in fact, it also applies to leading adults.
When the desired behavior drifts, when some other behavior is stepping in,
that's when we need to call attention to what's happening and help redirect back to the desired behavior or expectation.
So if there's something important that you want your team to focus on, that you want them to do consistently, don't just ask yourself, "Have I communicated it to them?"
Instead ask, "How am I reinforcing it?"
Because apparently, whether you're leading a team or walking your huge chocolate lab, consistency matters.